Category Archives: love

Plastic

I don’t understand the reason for plastic surgery,

Why can’t someone accept their natural beauty?

They’ve been destroying all their body parts little by little

Replacing their flesh with toxic and fake fiber.

 

Maybe it’s because of how the society acts and talks

Maybe it’s because of bullying folks

Maybe it’s because of insecurity and inferiority

Or their obsession with ideal beauty.

 

It’s sad to see people going under the knife

They were much prettier with their natural face,

Now they look more disturbed and distorted,

Filter their faces with light and darkness

 

To all the people out there who never felt acceptable

Love thyself and do things according to virtue

Instead of spending a million bucks to a plastic fake nose job

Give it to the poor people who needed much

 

In that way, you’re much prettier than any plastic beauty this world has to offer

Because your heart is full of love and humbleness

A beauty that worth more than a million bucks

Maintaining its natural resources no matter what.

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The Old Memories

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It was another day of fighting my urge to call her…

It’s been six months since she never texted me. I broke up with her because I can’t handle everything that was happening in her life. It felt like a prison to me. I can’t breathe and it choking me on. Despite that, I should have still stayed.

It was the lowest point of her life and yet I just shrug it off. I shouldn’t have left her. Thinking about all those memories we had made me feel homesick. Her embrace was my home, her smile was my strength, and her love was my wealth. For weeks she begged me to take her back but I’m too busy feeding my own ego. I was too angry and too disgusted to see good things that ever happened. Now she doesn’t even talk to me or even sent me messages. She moves on while I’m stuck in the past. I can’t see all her statuses and photos now since she blocked me on Social media just a month ago. I am still secretly wishing she will call me one day and telling how much she misses me. I know I’m stupid for letting her go. I know I’m not worth for her and this was my punishment.

Wherever I looked, I saw her smile, I saw her brown eyes, and I heard her laugh. She always appears in my dreams, in my thoughts, and in every woman that I dated. I try to look for her but I couldn’t find her anywhere. I love her so much and I know losing her was the biggest mistake I ever had. I wanted to return to the day she texted me that her life had been too miserable. We fight because she thought I’m just reading her messages. The truth was I just didn’t know how to respond from that time but if God had given me a chance, I won’t break up with her. I would try to help her in every possible way I could.  If only if I wasn’t a coward.

*Ring, ring, ring, ring*

There’s someone that was calling me…..

I look at the caller I.D and her name exactly pop out on my screen.

“Oh my god! It’s her!”

I know from the moment I saw her name, my heart jumped out of my chest. I had been waiting for this call all my life. Now, she finally called me.

“Hello?” I spoke to another line.

“Jade,”

Her sweet voice is ringing in my ears.

Please, say you miss me and everything would be alright, my princess. I promise I won’t leave you this time. I promise I would stay on your side during your anxiety attacks. I promise I love you until the end. I will do anything for you, just say you want me back. I miss you.

“Yes?” I answered back.

I can hear the excitement in her voice and how she had been through these past six months.

“Can I meet you up at the park? What time are you available?”

” I’m always available.” I found myself saying that without much thinking. I quickly regain my composure by telling her this:

“Ah, no. I’m sorry. I’m available at eleven.” I looked up at the wall clock that was hanging down my ceiling. It’s past nine so it’s a perfect timing. I have two hours to prepare for myself.

“Okay See you there.”

As soon as she hung up the phone, I went straight to bath and shaved all my excesses hair as well as trying to get a good shave with my shoulder-length hair. Then I style it down according to how she likes to style my hair back then. I remember how she softly caressed my hair with her long finger while telling me how good looking I am. This time, I need to be more representable. I need to show to her that I am looking forward to meeting her once more and secretly hoping to be more than her friend.

I arrived before ten, nervously tapping my shoes. How was my look? Do I look handsome today? Does she notice my outfit today? Are we going out on a date? Will she…

Before I could even practice the line of what I wanted to say to her, she already appeared.

Her appearance dramatically change. She’s slimmer than she was before and she colored her hair with blonde. She was now wearing a revealing V neck dress. She looks breath-taking. Then, she sat down next to me and smile.

“How are you these past few months?”

She asked me. I forgot what I need to say next. I forgot everything I had practiced before I even saw her. There’s something with her smile that I had never seen before. It’s shinning and full of energy. I answered to her with a trembling voice.

“I’ve been doing really good. Ho-how about you?”

She smiled once again that enough to stop my world, then she handed me an envelope.

A white envelope with her face smiling wearing a white veil casual dress while holding into a much older man. He was hugging next to her while planting her cheeks with a kiss. My whole world fell and I went into denial and confusion. I re-read once again what was written there but now I regret everything.

 

 

For My Ex-Boyfriend

If I only know you would leave me just because my problems were too much to you, I would never say “yes” in the first place. Because a true man who loves me will always love me no matter how many problems that will come my way. If you only love me, You will never ever gave up on me because you know, leaving me can never bring good for my life. You know I’m on the point of drowning but you drown me even more. Now, all your “I love you more” meant nothing to me. Now, all your promises meant nothing to me. For me, you’re just another guy who only wants my physical appearance but not my heart. Just another guy who will leave me just because I’m a depressed woman. Just another guy who came to break my heart. No, I love you. You just don’t feel the same. No, I did my everything and is ready to forget my family just to be with you but you were not just into me. Now I don’t know how to feel anymore cause I’m already dead inside. You made me who I am today. Now please, don’t go back to me. I don’t need someone like you. Find a woman who is a perfect fit for your high standard criteria and ideality and let see if you’ll ever find a perfect woman that can last you longer. Sometimes an ideal woman never meant to stay because they were just “ideal”. When we start to find who they really were, we start falling out of love with them. That’s what happens to us. Now, love a robot because robot never made mistake and its an ideal perfection for you. An ideal relationship that only existed in your mind. An ideal relationship you’ll soon regret.

 

Signs He loves You

  1. He accept all your flaws and imperfections.
  2. Support you in everything. Either problems or just your decision-making, he’s there reminding you that you have his back.
  3. There’s no thing as “too busy”. He will always make time for you whenever he can.
  4. He never lies about who’s with him and where he is.
  5. He’ll tell you when everything is too much. Like your actions are not good anymore for the benefits of the two of you.
  6. He will never cheat. Never. Because every time he was tempted, he thinks of you first before his own ego.
  7. He accepts whatever color and sizes you are. For his eyes, you will always be beautiful and he will always love you.
  8. In terms of big problems, he stays strong for you and showed you that no matter what happen, there will always another way around.
  9. He’ll always stay gentleman like the first day. He wont take advantage on you.
  10.  He always has patience no matter how longer you takes to dress or no matter how immature you are, he’s always has patience for you.
  11. He forgives you no matter how big it is.
  12.  Lastly, you just know it.

Always trust your instinct. If he haven’t done anything suspicious then it’s not worth arguing for. In these days, finding a man who will stay for you even against all the odds is very rare. So please took care of your man and just don’t look at the physical beauty. It doesn’t matter how handsome he was. What matter most is his HEART. ❤

The Ballad of the Two Hearts

Once, there was a child born in the midst of spring,

She was very pretty that the goddess of beauty envies her

She put a curse one night while the baby was sleeping,

The curse that will make her ugly, dark and thin

 

She grew up been bullied by everyone in her town,

Nobody ever plan to befriended her

She’s always been a loner all her life since her mother died,

All she could feel was pain and injustice inside.

 

One day while she was sitting outside the oak tree,

Her bullies come and bit her till she can’t walk and see

A man rescued her who happened to be

The blind ninja whom she always watched in a distance by the tree,

 

He let her entered the cottage from where he stay,

He gave her herbs to heal all her wounds and so she’ll be

Fine so soon so they can know each other more

Lived together away from those people

 

Soon her lonely heart was filled with gleeful joy,

Because at the end someone choose to be with her at all

With the handsome ninja whom she always adore

The promise he made to protect her forevermore,

 

But the goddess of Beauty was not happy to witness this

She called all her pigeons to find that special herb

That can help the blind ninja to see

How beautiful he thinks his wife could be.

 

Soon the ninja’s eyes filled with light,

Little by little he gain his sight

Witnessing this, the girl run out to flee

She’s afraid he will judge her the same way.

 

She cried out loud because of despair,

While the ninja run out looking for her,

Soon she stop by the bank of the river

The exact time the ninja stop to get some water

 

Their eyes met and their two hearts sing a ballad only two of them knew

The ninja ask, “My lady, I think I know you.”

She stared at him never know what to say,

As he realise she is his wife who run away.

 

The ninja come to hug her as her eyes filled with tears,

He whispered a word that every heart will melt,

“I’m afraid I lost you. Please don’t leave me again.

I don’t care whoever you are, I still love you the same,”

 

Then he kissed her sweet little lips as the forest start to sing

A glorious love song until the end

The two people who love each other in pure harmony and joy

That even goddess can’t destroy.

Beauty is a Fallacy

 

Wherever I go or whatever kind of place I am,

I always see a billboard with a woman

A white skin, a straight hair, a long nose, a small face

The ideal beauty that every woman wish.

 

My friends always say my rich chocolate skin is ugly

I would be much prettier without it.

They said my curly hair looks like a broom without a handle

My height is “too small” for an old teenager.

 

All these years I just swallow everything,

As I’m inferior than most of women I’ve seen.

In my class I was the only one with much darker skin,

That’s why “nigger” is my name.

 

All these years I just learn to love,

My height, my skin, my imperfections and doubts

I don’t blame God for making me this

I just hate the standard beauty I need to achieve.

 

I’d never seen a much darker Filipina in any advertisement

I’d never seen a woman with my color been praised

I’d never experience someone told me “You’re skin is very pretty”

All I can hear is “what ifs” from people with narrow heads in terms of real beauty.

 

Beauty isn’t about my skin color or my height or my hair

Beauty is about uniqueness and being fair

Beauty isn’t about fashion and beauty trends

Beauty is the ability to appreciate someone for whom they’ve been.

 

I tell them that beauty isn’t always what you can see.

It’s an illusion and a fallacy,

It’s a kind of perception with different meaning,

No standard beauty is alike as we’re peculiar being.

 

Yet people put label on things,

If you’re dark, you’re ugly; if you’re white, you’re pretty

When in fact beauty is just temporary,

What beneath that flawless skin wasn’t a doll,

What remains that pretty face was a skull.

 

Yes, they might be gorgeous with their skin, their hair, their height

But how about the inside of their heart?

Is it white and flawless as they’ve been?

Or darker than the darkest of a human skin?

 

It’s like telling God how ugly and unpleasant everything He creates.

As if there still a beauty left after death.

As if God will asked how beautiful you are on Earth,

As if He cared more about your face and not your deeds.